Rikki Jo Neyer's mother wore sunglasses inside the house—not as a fashion statement, but because light had become unbearable. For eight and a half years, Neyer watched her mother vanish into an illness that no doctor could name, a descent that eventually led to catatonia that went unrecognized. Now, Neyer is sharing that harrowing journey and the astonishing recovery that followed in her debut book, Do You Believe in Miracles? Our Journey Out of Darkness and Into the Light.
The book arrives as a testament to the millions of caregivers who fight for loved ones in a medical system that often overlooks profound suffering. Neyer's story is not just a memoir; it is a lifeline for those navigating similar darkness. "I did not set out to become an author," Neyer says. "I set out to survive a season that felt impossible. For eight and a half years I watched my mother disappear into an illness no doctor could name, and I realized that if I did not write it down, the world might never know what she went through." Her mother could not advocate for herself, so Neyer became her voice—a role familiar to countless caregivers who battle medical uncertainty, exhaustion, and fear while fighting relentlessly for answers.
Unlike traditional miracle stories that begin with the miracle, Neyer deliberately immerses readers in the darkness first. "Most miracle stories begin with the miracle and work backward," she explains. "This one makes you live through every year of the darkness before you get there." That darkness ended when her mother received Ativan and woke from her catatonic state. Her mother later summarized the experience: "I did die. And God brought me back." For Neyer, the recovery did not erase the years of suffering but gave them purpose, compelling her to tell the whole story—even the parts that were painful to revisit.
The book distinguishes itself by combining faith, caregiving, medical insight, and firsthand testimony. It includes four interviews with key witnesses, a scientific summary of catatonia, Scripture, and appendices specifically for caregivers, those struggling to keep going, and supporters. Neyer's nearly decade as her mother's primary advocate gives these resources particular weight. "I hope caregivers feel seen in a way that nothing else has made them feel seen," she says. "I hope anyone who has ever loved someone through a darkness that has no name finds language for what they have been carrying."
Neyer also hopes the book encourages readers facing unexplained symptoms or misdiagnoses to keep asking questions. "I hope anyone sitting with a misdiagnosis or fighting to be believed by a medical system that keeps looking away finds courage in these pages to keep asking questions," she says. At its core, the book asks its title question, and Neyer's answer is unequivocal: "And I hope every reader who has ever wondered whether God still finds people in the darkest places finds their answer here. He does. I am living proof. My mother is living proof."
The journey transformed Neyer's understanding of beauty, suffering, and faith. She came to see them not as opposites but as companions, and that hope can persist even when circumstances offer little evidence of change. She describes the writing process in three words: "Witness. Endure. Return." "I witnessed what happened to my mother and to our family," she explains. "I endured the process of putting it on the page and going back into rooms I had worked very hard to leave. And through the writing, I returned to myself. I returned to hope. I returned to a version of faith that had been tested in every possible way and was still standing."
Published by Lucid Books, an independent hybrid publisher in the Houston area, Do You Believe in Miracles? is available now. Most importantly, it is being published while Neyer and her mother can share the story together. Her mother is alive, participated in the book, and after eight and a half years that once seemed to have stolen so much, mother and daughter are making up for lost time.
